Jokes  part 7
Corinna returns home and says to her man: 'Michael, I'm just coming from the beauty salon.'
Michael looks at her and asks: 'Were there so many people, Corinna?' 'Why?'
'Because I think they haven't helped you.'
'I'm Napoleon!' screams a patient in a psychiatrical home.
A nurse asks him: 'How do you know that?'
Patient: 'God has told me that.'
Schumacher : 'I ??? I haven't told you anything !!!'

Hakkinen visits Schumacher. 'What would you like to drink ?' asks Schumacher.
'I would like a Côte du Rhône of 1985,' says Hakkinen.
Schumacher: 'Sorry, I don't have that. But I got a Spanish wine of $2.

Hakkinen and Coulthard see an ugly man cross the street.
Hakkinen: 'Oh, what an very ugly man is that Michael Schumacher !'
Coulthard: 'Don't say that. He can't help it that he is that ugly !'
Hakkinen: 'Maybe he can't, but he could at least stay inside !!!'
When Schumacher came home after playing golf with Hakkinen, his wife asked:
'Why do you never play with Coulthard?'
'Would you play golf with someone who plays false?' asked Schumacher.
'I don't think so,' she said. 'Coulthard doesn't want that too.'
The walking married couple Schumacher saw a boy and a girl sitting on a bench
and they were kissing. Corinna: 'Why don't you do that ???'
Michael: 'But baby, I don't even know that girl !!!'
Michael and Corinna are sitting romanticaly in a park.
Corinna asks: 'Do you want to see where I have been operated for my appendix ?'
Michael answers excited: 'Yes, certainly !'
'Overthere' indicates Corinna, 'in that big building with all those windows.'
Ralf's talkative brother Michael fell ill and lies in bed.
The doctor comes and put a thermometer in Michael's mouth.
'And now keep your mouth shut for 15 minutes,' says the doctor.
Ralf asks the doctor when they are at the hall:
'Well doctor, how much does a thermometer like that one cost?'
Hakkinen went to the zoo with Coulthard. Suddenly he sees a monkey which is very ugly.
Hakkinen: 'Look Coulthard, that monkey looks very much like Michael Schumacher!'
'Oh, you don't have to offend him like that !!!,' says Coulthard.
Hakkinen: 'The monkey sits so far away, he can't hear us !!!'

A stutterer says to Schumacher in the pub: ' W-w-well-l-l-l m-m-man, y-you are l-l-laughing
at-t-t m-m-me, b-b-but everyone h-has a aberration !
L-l-like: w-with w-wich hand d-do you w-w-wipe off your a-a-arse ?'
'With my left hand.' says Schumacher.
'W-well that's y-y-your a-a-aberration !
Most people use toilet paper !!!'

Schumacher:'Todt, my salary is not in relation with my achievements.'
'I noticed that too,' smiles Todt,
'but we can't give you that little money.'

A Ferrari fan comes at the boxoffice with $150.
The man behind the boxoffice asks: What do you want:
'a ticket or a Ferrari ???'

Schumacher takes his historie finals. 'Which Frenchman was first general, then First Consul
and after that emperor ?' Schumacher is thinking, shakes his head and says:
'I'm sorry, professor, but I don't know it.'
'Napoleon Bonaparte !' says the professor. Schumacher gets up and walks away.
'Where are you going to ?,' calls the professor after him.
Schumacher: 'I beg your pardon, but I thought you were calling over the next person ???'
The very domestic miss Schumacher calls the news paper after her man Michael died to inform what a announcement costs. '$4 per 5 words,' says the telephonist. 'Oh ..., and how much is it when I only give up 2 words? Then I will only give up: Schumacher died.' 'No, miss, the minimum for an announcement is $4. So you can give 3 more words.'
Miss Schumacher is thinking and says: 'Ferrari for sale.'


Schumacher throws a double cognac in his aquarium. 'Why did you do that?' asks Corinna.
'Well,' says Michael, 'I like to see happy faces around me !!!'


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If you have any comments or new jokes mail me !!!